Yesterday I came home from BKK after being there for 5 days. Although money was pouring out of my pockets the entire time I was there, it was a nice break from life, from reality. I had 4 days where I wasn't brushing ants off of my bed, 4 days where I didn't have to worry about mosquitos invading my room, and 4 days where I got to stand under a hot shower and sleep with a comfortable pillow (ok, the pillow thing only happened for 2 nights). I spoke English every day and didn't have to worry about peoples status' and wai'ing. At two of my hotels (yes, I stayed in a total of 3), the front desk got a kick out of speaking to me in Thai because I don't think they have met many farangs that can even come close to speaking Thai. We would go back and forth speaking in Thai-glish to each other. I believe I was definitely their favorite guest for the nights I stayed with them.
Yesterday, I was headed home. I planned to arrive in Phitsanulok (Pi'lok) sometime between 5-6 so I could catch the last bus to my site. I was pretty sure that I would arrive around 5 and have plenty of time. But, as things work in Thailand, my bus didn't leave on time. The bus was on "thai time". When I got on the bus in BKK, there were 4 guys and a professional video camera on the bus filming. From what I could tell, they were filming a documentary about the bus and how to load passengers on the bus…weird. Anyways, they spent the better part of an hour shooting themselves getting on and off the bus, explaining how the seating worked, and passing out our food. This is when I started to fear that we were going to be late…and yes, late we were. It was too much to hope that my final bus would be on Thai time too. We got to Pi'lok at about 6:15. The bus to Bangrakam had already left.
So here I am, stranded in Pi'lok, 30 minutes from my site wondering how I am going to get home. I almost decide to just grab a hotel for the night (more money lost) and a pizza ($$$$) and catch the first bus in the morning, but I call Ron Muay first to ask her if there is a song taow that might still be running now. After about 4 phone calls, I have a driver coming to pick me up (yup, you heard me…I have a driver, well, my Tessaban has a driver). I am so ready to be home. At this point, I had been traveling for about 6 hours and am ready for a shower, food, and sleep.
My driver comes, takes me home, and I greet my host family. Guess what? We have no running water in our house. Apparently, we haven't for a few days…no shower for me. Ok, food then bed. Ah, nice. I turned on my air conditioning, threw on a show (Firefly), and ginned some kaao (Thai-glish for 'ate food'). My trip to BKK is complete…until next time.
I'm not sure how this no water thing is supposed to work. I woke up this morning and someone from my family had dumped some water into a bucket in my bathroom. This is great so I can use the bathroom, but this will do nothing for brushing teeth, washing clothes, or cleaning dishes. The water is brown…I think they took it from the river. Ok…so I will not be cooking any food and I will be smelly once all of my clothes are dirty…or sooner considering I am not taking a shower in that either. I have been invited to Pi'lok this weekend with a friend. I was going to turn it down because I was just gone, but if we have no water…hmm.
I have been wondering if I am the only PC volunteer (from my group), that has gone online at some point and started researching jobs, colleges, housing, etc, back in the states. Over the last few weeks, I have spent part of my days looking at Master degree programs at various colleges, researched the GRE and GMAT, and looked into jobs. I even caught myself on craigslist once checking out apartments. It feels strange that I am only 6 months into PC and I am already searching out ideas and possibilities for my future. I found some great fellowship programs through Peace Corps in Colorado, Maryland and Washington D.C. There is even one for the University of WA that looks promising if I want to head back there. I am thinking of a Masters in Public Administration…I think. That is my current thoughts on it. I decided that I don't want to get my masters if I have to work full time while doing it. I am tired of going to school while working full time. I am fine with a part time job, and/or internship, but I don't think that I want to go back to work full time if I end up going to school…I'll think about it (I don't want a ton of debt either). But, anyways, back to the point. I have been wondering if I am the only person that has been researching my future, searching for my next step. Turns out that I am not. I have talked to many people in my group, and there are quite a few of us that have been doing this. Whew! Relief! People have been planning trips, college, jobs, etc…over these last few months just as I have.
The question is why? Why do we do this? Are we not happy? Are we already ready to move on? Or, are we just your typical Americans that are always looking into the future? I think it is a mix of a few things. I think that some of the volunteers are confused. Thailand is a developing country. There are areas of the country, like BKK, that almost make you feel like you are back in the states (foreign food, movies, malls, various languages, etc), but when you move away from the cities, you are met with a variety of different levels of lives. Some people live in shacks with gaping holes in walls, have their homes flooded every year, others live in cement homes protected from the weather. Almost every part of Thailand has electricity and running water of some sort. For many of us, it comes down to our particular schools or government offices that we work in on how needed we feel. I have heard that some teachers speak great English and run very well put together English classes already, therefore, why were they put there to assist? What are they supposed to do for 2 years? Some SAO or Tessaban offices already run programs to help the elderly, reduce the dog issues, and promote health in their villages. Volunteers had many ideas of what they were going to do to help their tambon before they arrived only to find out the tambon is moving forward and upward on their own. Why were they placed here?
Thailand is in a strange position. They have many developed areas or soon to be developed areas surrounded by areas of poverty. It is a hard country to be a PC volunteer in because you have to find out where exactly your area is at, and find a way to work from there. You may not be working in an area as impoverished as you thought you would. That completely changes you frame of mind on how you were going to help out. It is difficult to do that. It is difficult to see how you can help the community when you see them doing so well by themselves. Peace Corps is re-evaluated how they can assist Thailand right now and I think that many of us see why. I think that Thailand can still use Peace Corps, we need change the program to fit the direction that Thailand is headed.
Thai people don't really believe in thinking about their future. They think in the now. It is a strange concept to them that Americans spend time mapping out how they want their future to go. We plot our lives ahead of time, searching for goals to reach. Thai people don't spend too much time on the future, because they want to focus on the now. What is happening now? What can we do about this now? What am I feeling now? I wonder if American's should take a note of this. Yes, I still believe that we need to look into the future, there does need to be some planning, but I also believe that American's need to take a moment to live in the now. Experience life instead of planning what is going to happen next. Now, even with this realization, I am not going to stop looking at colleges or programs, in the next few months I will probably start studying for my GRE, and I will still wonder 'what comes next', but I am going to try to experience Thailand instead of just letting this opportunity fly by. Jai-yen-yen
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